First, one of my favorite sights of the week. Seeing my kids playing together happily is one of my favorite things. Being able to let them run “wild” outside in the pre-dinner light isn’t bad either.
Then, I had to share this in the name of keeping things real:
What you’re looking at is one of my kid’s Mother’s Day papers she completed at school for me. She says some funny stuff in there like “The smartest thing my mother has ever told me is that I’m smart!”, but I did feel convicted over my oft seen impatience when I read “What’s one thing you think your mom should do less of?” and she said, “yelling at me, my brother, and sisters.” OUCH!!!! And, how about “What’s one thing you think your mom should do more of?” answered “Spending time with us”?? Ouch, again! Nothing like kids to tell you how they feel! Now, what to do with this information?? We’ve already had a pretty good conversation about how she feels, but I’d like more, and will pursue those.
I think it’s so interesting (and frightening) that I’m going to affect my kids differently b/c they are all, in fact, different! To one child, I may be able to express frustration with a raised voice without doing damage, but doing that with another could shut them down. I feel a responsibility to parent my four differently, as individuals, but I can only do what I can do. And sometimes, I just walk around feeling like a huge failure (like right after reading this sheet). This parenting thing is no joke. I’m hoping that admitting my failures goes a long way. And then, since I’m usually yelling and being “angrey” when my children are acting less like friends and more like my enemies (trashing their straightened-by-me drawers, demanding service with no gratitude, etc), I want to be working on loving the “enemies” in my own house. To fight be kind when I least want to would be good for everyone I live with.
Some comfort from that sheet: she said I was good a making dinner and she is sure that before I had kids, I was spending most of my time wanting to have kids. So, she at least knows she’s wanted! But, seriously, I never could have known how much I would enjoy my children. They are the gifts I didn’t know I wanted, but needed the most.
Happy Mother’s Day to all the mother’s out there. In honor:
::requested this from the library
::a picture into the worry of a soon-to-be mother’s mind
::a potential mother’s day treat?